THE TARNISHED GOLDEN RULE

It was after a particularly long and tough football practice.

We all lumbered on the bus that would take us back to our warm, safe (i.e. away from the coaching staff) dorm rooms. I settled in for what I expected would be an uneventful ten-minute ride back to the college campus. My expectations were not met.

The bus sat; we waited, waited and waited some more. Just before our tempers got to the mean side of ugly, the bus door opened and in flew the head coach hissing through clenched lips and flared nostrils.

"You guys stunk up the place tonight. I won't even ride on the same bus with you -- I'm walking back, now get out of here." He slammed the bus door and stormed into the frigid, black Wisconsin night.

There we sat, in silence, dirty, grimy, tired and thoroughly chewed out.

The reality of the situation hit me --WE did such a poor job that HE was going to walk miles in the cold Wisconsin night! I'm sorry but I had to laugh (quietly). My bemused assessment of the ridiculousness of the situation was not shared by everyone. My teammate sitting next to me said, in a wavering voice, "How can you be laughing, the coach thought we did such a s____y job that he won't even ride with us."

I recognize I was a bit old to be first getting this basic insight, but at that moment, I finally got it -- not everybody is motivated by the same thing!

The coach "walking" brought me to stifled laughter directed at the coach and my teammate to frustrated disappointment directed at himself.

My football coaches, in both high school and college, attempted to motivate me, and everybody else, through fear. It wasn't until my senior year in college when the local newspaper wrote a complimentary article about me, and I had one of my best games that next week, that I realized I was motivated by praise. If my coaches had praised instead of criticized, I don't know how good I could have become.

I had the opportunity to observe Vince Lombardi working with the championship Packers of the '60s. One of the major reasons Vince was so successful and is remembered, is because he spent the practice praising those who needed praise and raising hell with those who thrived on raised hell.

How are you motivated? How are those you wish to motivate, motivated?


Lesson:  "Do unto others as you wish others to do unto you" doesn't always work when it comes to motivation.