OH YOU POOR BABY...

Imagine you arrive home about an hour later than usual. You drop your coat on the floor and yourself on the couch. With a concerned look, your politically correct spouse/partner/significant other/companion, observes your glazed appearance and says, "We have to talk. These last couple of months you have been especially uncommunicative with me and the kids. You've been argumentative with the neighbors. You do little else but stare at the TV, and half of the time it's not even on! And you're drinking more than you ever have. What's wrong?"

"I'll tell you what's wrong. My boss won't get off my back; customers are constantly complaining; policies keep changing; rumors about reorganizing are running wild; and all my coworkers have bad attitudes. It's a jungle out there that's why I'm the way I am."

Your s/p/so/c responds, "Oh, you poor baby, have a glass of wine and relax."

"Thank you," you say with a slump and sigh.

Now let's change the scene a bit. You go home at night about an hour later than usual. And drop your coat on the floor and yourself on the couch. Your s/p/so/c comes over to you and says, "We have to talk. These last couple of months you have been especially uncommunicative with me and the kids. You've been argumentative with the neighbors. You do little else but stare at the TV, and half of the time it's not even on! And you're drinking more than you ever have. What's wrong?"

"This time you respond, "I'll tell you what's wrong. My boss won't get off my back; customers are constantly complaining; policies keep changing; rumors about reorganizing are running wild; and all my coworkers have bad attitudes. So I'm choosing to be this loser you see slumped over on the couch. Could you get me another drink please?"

If you do get another drink, it's a good bet that for telling the truth you'll have to get that drink yourself!

Lesson: When you make others responsible you get sympathy, when you make yourself responsible you get control.